Monday, 30 May 2011

'Til we meet again Daddy..

Here's my eulogy to my Dad during his interment..

"Hoy babae!Nasan ka na?Miss na kita agad.143.", "Kumain ka na ba?143", "Pauwi ka na? Worried ako at nahapunan ang bunso ko.143"-these are just some of Dad's text messages/"hirits" that I will always treasure. Who's going to text me now? Well, it won't be Dad.

I just want to wake up from this horrible dream. Dad's demise was too sudden and too soon. But the pain is just too real for me not to face. I should be strong for the family. I know that's what Dad would have wanted.

Daddy was a simple man. For him, the most important thing was the family. That was the main reason why he ventured in school service business. He wanted to always check on us, to bring us lunch and feed us. Well, he just wanted to be sure that we were safe and he just wanted to be there. 

To me, dad was..well, my dad-my protector,my wall,my no. 1 fan. Dad was strict but loving. I could remember a time wherein I got home past 8 PM. Dad got really mad and I cried myself to sleep. Giving my Dad heartaches was the last thing on my mind. The next morning, Dad stood on the foot of the bed, crying. He hugged me and he apologized for how he overreacted. I then knew that my Dad was one of a kind.

I could remember a random time wherein my Dad apologized for he could not give us a luxurious life. The truth is, he gave us more than money could buy. He gave us love, care and priceless time. We had great conversations, he made sure that we leave the house with full tummies, and he texted us just to let us know that we were thought of. Daddy was thoughtful. He was a great Dad.

Daddy and I had a lot of memories. I am at a loss and I could not share every single one. I just want to share one of our most recent conversations. I was teasing my Dad "Dad, I’m 22 pero wala pa akong boyfriend". He seriously replied "Cheen, hindi hinahanap ang boyfriend. God will give you the BEST man". But dad, I know that I will never find the best for you are the best man and I have lost you. No one will ever compare to you Dad!

I would also like to add that my Dad had a great sense of humor and his smile was cheap. Anyone could afford it. He would smile at random people. When asked “Kilala mo ‘yun?”, he would simply answer “Hindi.” That’s how friendly Dad was.

I have now lost my first love-the man who always called me beautiful..who always held my hand..who called me darling and sweetheart...treated me like a baby no matter how big I’ve grown..the man who loved me unconditionally. I know that Dad is here. I just want to say "Dad, I am proud of the life you have lived and I am so blessed because I had you in my life. Any man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad. Thank you for everything.”

I will take care of the family Dad but it will take us a lifetime to fully recover because we will miss you everyday..we love you dad and see you in God's time.

First Love Never Dies..

I fear death. I dread losing a loved one.

May 19, 2011, Thursday—It seemed like a normal day although some of our routines changed. I was at home the whole day with my Dad, my 2 older brothers, my sister-in-law, my nephew, my aunt and our house help. Around 3:00 PM, my Mom asked me to go with her in the beauty parlor and I obliged. I asked my Dad if he wanted to come but he said no. At 4:30 PM, my Dad was in the shower and I said goodbye. I did not give him a goodbye kiss..I never thought that that would be my last talk with my Dad…

On May 19, 2011, I lost my Daddy. He was found on the kitchen floor, unconscious and a little cold. My older brother even gave him a CPR. He was then rushed to the nearest hospital wherein the nurses and doctors tried to revive him for over an hour. My Dad was already intubated when my Mom and I arrived. Doctors and nurses surrounded him. He was resuscitated and defibrillated. In my mind I knew my Dad was gone..but in my heart, I was hopeful. Past 7:00 PM, my Dad was pronounced dead. As a nurse, I felt guilty in a way though I did not know where I was wrong. If only I had the power..I would have saved Daddy.

I still wish that this is just a nightmare. But I know that what we have is just borrowed time.

To my first love, I will miss and love you forever...

Wednesday, 11 May 2011

Bag Invasion

I just realized how big my bags are. I guess it's because of the stuff I usually carry.

Bag-Estee Lauder

Here are the essentials that help me get by each and every day..:)

Umbrella-Fibrella.  I always bring an umbrella with me since the weather is sometimes unpredictable. And well, UV radiation stimulates the production of melanin. I don't want to get any darker. LOL. And oh, skin cancer.
Cellphone-Nokia.  Who here doesn't have a cellphone?It's a necessity nowadays.
Make-up kit (comb-can be bought anywhere, lip balm-Nivea, mascara-VS, lip stick-Maybelline, blush-Mac, compact powder-Maybelline).  These are the beauty essentials I always carry around although I do not wear mascara too often. And I just bring the compact powder for the mirror. :)
Wallet-Liz Claiborne. Money, ID's, ATM, pictures-need I say more?
Notebook and pen. I just bring these in case something pops in my head. :)

Wet ones and hand gel-Watsons. For hygienic purposes.
Body Mist-Curve Crush by Liz Claiborne. For me, beauty would be incomplete without sweet fragrance.
Book. I always carry around a good book (or a Reader's Digest) for a good read. We'll never know when boredom would strike.

I have always wanted to do this. One dream down. :)

Wednesday, 4 May 2011


I will never forget our ecstasy when we got hold of these shirts. We used to drool (well, we still do!) over Joey’s unique tees every time we watch Eat Bulaga. We are very pleased to have these on...

Joey de Leon shirts by Molecules

BTW, my Dad has "The Eatles" shirt but he was asleep when we took this pic..Too bad!

I just love mine.

Sunday, 1 May 2011


I was invited to a barangay fiesta so I decided to wear something festive. I also considered the fact that we were gonna pig out so I opted for an outfit that would somehow conceal my full tummy :-)

tube top-XOXO|crocheted bolero-Ann Taylor|jeans-Human|red flats-Mags
bag-Isaac Mizrahi|necklace and bangles-from Mom

I just love fiestas--truly FILIPINO. I guess that's one thing we can't flush out of our systems.

Well, I got to see some of my friends but sadly, my best bud and I had to eat and then run...hahaha!!We had some other duties to attend to. Also, I was too busy eating that I forgot to take pictures of my friends. What a shame!